Why These IRRs Are Sometimes So Tough …

I think Mrs. Bojanowski off the mama’s boy reality show is in love with her own son jojo. I think her love for him goes way beyond the motherly kind. Any woman would be crazy to get tangled in that mess. Its sick! Just sick — Submitted by: marymarymar

Although I’m not sure I agree that Mrs. B is unnaturally attached to her son, I do think her cultural attitudes offer really good insight into why some interracial relationships fall apart under the pressure of divergent cultural values. I thought that in her profile video, she said something about being from Iraq. Am I right? I’ve noticed something about people from certain countries outside Europe and the U.S., including Jamaica, from where my heritage is derived: older people are physically incapable of seeing members of the younger generation as anything other than their personal property and when it comes to respect, they refuse to reciprocate. It goes way beyond expecting young people to have respect for their elders, an idea that I generally agree with. 

People of Mrs. B generation and older, and who are from old-world countries or any other place that values older citizens, believe that they are to be revered, placed at the center of everything and that securing and maintaining their happiness should be the goal of every young person with whom they have contact. Mrs. B felt that Mindy should be kissing her butt in order to gain acceptance (which she would never give), and she threw a tantrum because none of the young women wanted to make a traditional Iraqi dish during the cooking challenge. I rolled my eyes as she huddled on a set of nearby steps and wept about how her feelings were hurt. She must have forgotten that in a few short days before that she freely and without remorse trashed Asians, blacks, Jews and a host of other types of women in that house. Their feelings were not taken into account while Mrs. B was running her mouth. Nothing more than manipulative b-s, something that I’ve seen over and over from old school matrons who think young people ought to worship the ground under their feet. 

An attitude like that is too extreme. It goes beyond what is reasonable in terms of how young people should treat their elders, and it would make life hell for any young woman to accept, especially an independent and accomplished American, British, French or other modern woman from one of the more affluent or ‘white’ countries. Imagine being married in that environment — until death parted you and your husband. (If Jojo had picked someone like Vita Alexander, death might very well have visited that family.) The expectations would be crushing and a woman would be in for a lot of abuse if she failed to live up to those impossible expectations. 

Of course, I do think that Mrs. B is a racist, no doubt. She made that fact plain and clear when she became physically violent at the sight of her son making out with a black woman. And when the helicopter landed, she made a show of sitting on the side and dry heaving in disgust. And calling Misty all kinds of nasty names usually reserved for prostitutes and the like.


1 thought on “Why These IRRs Are Sometimes So Tough …

  1. I wonder why people like Mrs B come to US or USA, if they want their son’s to marry traditional Iraqi women, they should go back to Iraq to get these women, however if they get a particular girl from Iraq for their sons, the wife in question wll put up with all the rubbish, the mother does, until she gets her citizenship then she leaves them and that puts the family in shock. They get another wife and she does the same thing, then another wife and it slowly dawn on Jojo, that he will end up living wih his mother. The trouble with human beings, they want dominion over each other and that cannot work, there is something in us that make us become resistful and especially a country like US, where you have rights, that is not working anymore.

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