Today’s Google doodle features Harriet Tubman, an American-born slave who boldly fled to freedom, became an abolitionist who helped rescue more than 300 from bondage in 19 Underground Railroad mission, and went on spy missions for the Union army during the civil war. This incredible woman was one of the first figures that I, and my peers at school, encountered during Black History Month exercises and the slavery era in American history.

Thank goodness those days are long gone. Right? Well, mostly yes, but that is a conversation for another day — and maybe another space.

But some people insist on trying to impose old shackles on modern Black women, especially concerning their decisions — of their own free will — to marry white men. I underscore free will because Black misogynists and their handmaids who “don’t agree with” interracial dating often prefer to liken these loving relationships with the master and bedwench dynamic that happened so often in that horrendous era. It’s horrid. It’s gross, and it is transparent. Most of all, it is far removed from the close and loving relationships that Black women are choosing to have with men outside their race. Sometimes these relationships go long term and lead to marriage. Why shouldn’t they deserve the same shot at happiness as Black women who were lucky enough to find their IBMs and are living stable and healthy lives?

The answer is they shouldn’t, and they are not going back into patterns where they likely face life alone if they don’t find the Black man of their dreams. Or patterns where they take abuse and mistreatment from men inside their race if they can find a reasonable chance of happiness with someone outside their normal circles. Things are changing. Black women are increasingly making different choices, and they feel like it is working for them.

We’ll see where this all ends up, I guess!